ILLUSTRATION FRIDAY: CRASH

The crash landing is only the beginning of your troubles.

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BARRED OWL

I work hard for my money. So hard for it, honey. I work hard for my money, so you better let me sleep in on the weekend. Unless, of course, there's a big owl sitting in the pines outside the apartment.

Such was the case this morning. I'm woken by Iris coming in with the dog. "GET UP! THERE'S AN OWL OUTSIDE!" She then leaves with the camera. "Coffee?" I say, meekly, to the closed door.

I get dressed and go outside. "Take your time," she says sarcastically. I look up, and there he was. To get his attention, Iris says in her best owl impression, "Who cooks for You! Who cooks for You!" Doesn't work. I, however, am the Beastmaster. I know the language of owls.

Spanish.

"Hey, mi amigo! Como esta? Mira aqui con sus ojos grandes!"

That worked. He looked right at me. Then he swooped down, silently, and ripped my scalp off.

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SCREAMING KITTY

A fan of the kitties once told me that Francis Bacon's SCREAMING POPE gave her nightmares.

What's stronger: Love for kitties, or fear of Screaming Art?

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Who finds me irresistable?

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BLUE JAY #2

What's to say? It's a Jay. I hear them all day. Flying every which way, too scared to land on the moving bird food tray. Dismay! Oy Vay!

This is painted with watercolor, not cray...

on.

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CHOCOLATE PUSHER

Want some... Candy?

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ILLUSTRATION FRIDAY: SPROUT

See, THAT'S why you shouldn't pop pimples. You never know what they'll sprout into!

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BLUEBIRD #2

Bluebirds for me are the Tom Petty of birds. I've always enjoyed Tom Petty. I wouldn't say he's my favorite, but I never change the station when he comes on the radio. Same deal with the bluebird. It's always a treat to see them flitting about.

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KITTY INTERRUPTED

Life is violent. There's no getting around it. Sure, your presence may have distracted the kitty momentarily, allowing the mouse time to escape, but it doesn't matter. It's just a matter of time. We're all worm food in the end.

So can you tell I recently re-watched "The Seventh Seal"? The squire has my favorite line in the movie (paraphrasing): "It's hopeless! Don't you see? I'm trying to comfort you!" Easily one of the best comedies of all time.

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SHABBY SHEIK

Inspired by eBay misspellings in the titles for vintage jewelry.

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ILLUSTRATION FRIDAY: RED

It was all I could do to not make some Commie/Red State Fusion statement. I wanted to paint Dubya with a Che tee-shirt. But I didn't.

I actually have two images, as I squirted out more red paint than intended. The first, good ol' Satan:

I think I'll title this one INCREDULOUS CATTY SATAN (ed. woops - forgot what incredulous meant for a second there). He's looking at you like you've brought the wrong shoes to Hell.

Here's the other red-inspired painting:

How about FREAKY SLEEPER for this one? Title suggestions welcome.

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Happy 27th birthday, Iris.

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TREE #18

I like to think the tree in the distance is aware of the fallen log, and is contemplating it's own mortality. Why should humans be the only ones with angst?

That reminds me: Happy Birthday, Iris.

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TREE #17

I am developing a small stack of ACEOs that are in varying stages of completion. That's putting it nicely - most of them are pretty Gawd Awful Terrible^TM; I'm hanging on to them with the hopes that someday I'll have the talent and know-how to fix them. This is one of those.

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LAWRENCE OF ARABIA IN 24 QUICK SKETCHES
UPDATE: ILLUSTRATION FRIDAY IS SUPER HERO!

Maybe a little bit of a stretch, but Lawrence Of Arabia was a super hero of sorts. Well, at least until the Turkish torture incident... "You have an interesting face..."

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I wanted to draw last night, but Lawrence Of Arabia was on. Sure, we could have DVRed it, but then I'd have to set aside four hours some other time. And it's one of my favorite movies. Why not do both at the same time? So I sketched random scenes while watching. Here's the result. This won't make any sense if you haven't seen the movie recently. Or a few dozen times.

This is my well.

First the guns, and now this.

bad camel sketches

Omar and Alec

If the camels die, we die.

a better camel

How much of THAT is there?

The sun's anvil

waiting for their return

Nothing is written.

Tell them we're coming.

For his pleasure. My mother mated a scorpion.

Did you do it?

Why do you walk?

Who are you? Two glasses of lemonade, please.

OK, we paused it here for Iris to take the dog out. Hence the greater detail. Here's the text: I want to know, sir, if I can tell them in your name that we have no ambitions in Arabia.

Now we are talking turkey, no?

Alec and extra with their booty - a parasol and clock.

They can only kill me with a golden bullet. I must find something honorable.

You have an interesting face. A man can't want what he wants.

Jolly good about the squash court. There may be honor among theives, but none among politicians. He is the same man.

NO PRISONERS! For the bloody papers.

You speak to me of bloodshed? They're leaving.

We are equally glad to be rid of him.

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BLUE GUITAR

Headed to the south, to the land of the pine
I'm thumbin' my way into North Caroline
Starin' at the road, prayin' to god I see headlights.

Those would be some lyrics from the song Wagon Wheel by Old Crow Medicine Show. That's the band in large part responsible for me dusting off my guitar (which is green, actually) and putting it to use. One could argue that they were also an instigator for our move from Brooklyn to Greensboro.

Anyway, here's a guitar. A blue one. Get your's out of the closet - the chords to the OCMS song are G, D, Em, C then G, D, C, C.

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CHEEKY BUNNY

Seems like from time to time I need to put my masculinity into question. Sure, there's a part of me that wishes every paintbrush induced creation would be all cool and edgy. Art that would make the viewer not want to chance upon me in a dark alley, debating between placing a bid or calling the cops. But in reality, I have limited control of these things. So here you go: A cute little bunny with fat cheeks.

Yeah, I could make up a story about how this bunny is wanted in 16 states for armed robbery. I could tell you about the time he was almost caught selling plutonium to terrorists. How he runs an underground market in Trans-fats foods in New York. But would you believe me? Just look at those pudgy, wudgy wittle cheeks!

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TREES #16: LOOK UP!

One of the big selling points of Greensboro for the wife and I were the crazy tall trees. "Dang," I said upon visiting the park, "those are some crazy tall trees!"

Seriously. They're the kind of trees that on a windy day, you're risking life (and limb, har har har) just walking amongst them. Each tree sways like an inebriated choir boy singing O Holy Night. Except these choir boys are several stories tall, and make loud cracking noises as they bump into each other. And they look like trees, not humans. So maybe that image isn't so accurate.

Changing the subject: Hey, look! Pretty trees! Dang, they're tall!

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PORCH DREAMS

Hey look! That's me(ish), sitting on my imaginary porch, playing and singing as loud as I want on my imaginary acreage.

Now git off my property.

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FLOWER BUZZ - ILLUSTRATION FRIDAY

Mmmmm... this flower smells so good, you can SEE the scent. Makes one positively heady. Let's hope the Dudes Eradicating Americanism don't find out about it.

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